...that is the question. And I have come to the decision NOT TO BLOG.
I began asking myself why I blogged in the first place - and the truth is, partly, I wanted to share some of the things that I do with others because.. well I guess I thought my life was interesting... why wouldn't everyone else? And because I fancied myself a writer... and because I often feel I have something important to say and everyone should listen...
These are no longer good enough reasons for me to continue... if the blog was in any way therapy (and it could have been) then it has done it's job.
Now I increasingly resent the time spent on the computer. I also resent the fact that I find myself worrying about what to blog about next. Which topics to include, which to let go. Should I tell you all about the strings of garlic I have hanging in my shed? Of which I am soooo proud... but surely the fact that I have grown enough garlic for a whole year (well almost) is reward enough... I don't need to Lord it over those whose garlic did less well... I am not proud of admitting that some of my posts have been motivated by such pride.
I do feel that many of you who comment are like-minded souls and should we meet in the real world, we may be friends, however - I do not know you... you are spirits on the ether and worrying about you deserting me for pastures new if I fail to update regularly is, in reality, a total waste of my time. I do not mean to be rude to anyone but in short, I no longer wish to write about it, I want to simply do it, to live it, to enjoy it and to share it with a real physical person who comes round for tea and cake.
And so. Thank you to everyone who has been kind and commented on my posts in the past. Thank you to Mr DTB who kindly swapped some seeds for lovage. Thank you to all the kind people who sponsored my son's Mt Kilimanjaro climb, and those people who sent me hand made items to sell for Help for Heroes. Thank you for the support when I was feeling down and for praising me when I did good. It was all greatly appreciated. I shall be checking your blogs from time to time - but perhaps less than I used to.
And to my real life family and friends who read my blog... well lets just meet up for coffee or pick up the phone more often.